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Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Corrupt International Divorce Justice?

Corrupt International Divorce Justice?
This is written in the own words of a Thai friend of mine. I have edited and corrected mistakes. While relationships and marriages do break up for whatever reason, surely where children are involved, the parties do their utmost to protect their children from any fall-out! The issues are also somewhat complicated by the international nature and the fast that they were living in an Islamic country!
One should also bear in mind here that Thai mothers are considered some of the best in the world putting the interest of the child above all else! I should also be borne in mind that this excuse of a man, a possible sociopath, took the woman out of a good paying job to start a family with her, then taking her out of her homeland Thailand, initially to Germany, then to the UAE.
If someone knows of anyone, or an organizations who can help her, especially as her resources have been severely depleted, then please leave a comment and I will get back to you!
Thank You!

So here is her story:-

I am a 44 year old Thai woman born in Thailand of Thai parents. I have one brother and two sisters and I am the eldest. I finished a Bachelors degree and then went to work in Thailand as an accountant, then in PR followed by secretary to a general manager in 1998 where I met and fell in love with a German man. In 1999 I married him in Thailand,in Bangkok.
Our first daughter was born in 2001 in a Thai hospital. We then lived in Germany where our second child, a boy, was born in 2004. My husband was an engineer specialising in industrial waste water treatment and I was a full-time housewife.
In 2005, we moved to Dubai in the UAE and both our children went to a German school in Dubai, beginning with kindergarten. I was still a full-time housewife while my husband worked and traveled every few months to other countries for short periods, sometimes for a longer time.
We lived in Dubai since 2005 up until 2015, when my husband out of the blue just told me that he wanted to divorce me. We had talked about this since 2013 and I still didn't want a divorce. My husband told me he wanted his freedom and was unhappy to remain in the family and that was his reason for the divorce but I disagreed. In February 2015 his lawyer sent me notification that my husband had filed papers with a court in Berlin, Germany with the intention of divorcing me under EU/German law. I received all the papers from his lawyer and he provided and paid for a German lawyer for me as I didn't have an income. In reality though my lawyer seemed to actually be acting on behalf of my husband, saying I should agree to all his proposals, for example, he would have custody of both children and he would pay me for 8 years, the first 4 at 400 Euro per month and 250 per month for the last 4, but with nothing for accommodation, transportation or the future! He had also promised to pay while the divorce was in progress but stopped paying after only 2 months, so since the end of March up until now he hasn't even paid me what he promised he would. He wanted me to leave Dubai and return to Thailand and just refuses to support me, not even paying for my lawyer or the flight back. In fact he sends me absolutely nothing, not even anything for our 10 year old son who is now with me in Thailand. I asked him to at least pay for his school but he's refused even that! He thinks I should take responsibility for everything even though the divorce hasn't yet been finalised with him being the instigator as I really didn't want a divorce and the whole situation is having an impact on the children. The children obviously still need their mother and their father has separated them with our daughter now somewhere in Germany or the UAE and with no means of contacting me with her obviously missing her mother and brother and wanting to come to Thailand. She loves Thailand and has been coming every year in July and never wanted to go and live in Germany.
At the beginning of June we attempted to escape from Dubai as both children wanted to leave with me but my husband had taken and hidden the children's visas and passports, which of course prevented all of us from leaving Dubai, but the worst of it was was that I was conned by a Dubai immigration lawyer who had told me that if I paid him 5,000Dhs (50,000 baht), he could get temporary 30 day visas issued for the children. I paid but the papers were rejected by the airline in Dubai so I called my husband so he could clear things with the airline because both children were desperate to leave and go to Thailand with me and just did not want to be separated. My daughter started to be more aggressive against her father as she didn't want to be apart from her mother but he just refused, eventually allowing my son to leave with me but my poor daughter had to stay with him in Dubai. He did however promise that our daughter would be able to visit her brother and myself in Thailand within 30 days so I changed her ticket to depart the end of June. But of course my husband broke his promise and I don't really know where my daughter is. Is she with some relative in Germany while he is still in Dubai?
I haven't had any contact at all with her for more than 2 months now! I am desperate to get my son into a school and I expect my husband to be fair and adhere to Thai law, as that is the law under which we were married! My daughter was born in Thailand and obviously still needs her mother and brother as the three of us have always been very close especially with their father being away so much. Our treatment in Dubai was just so unfair because with the UAE being an Islamic country, men come above all others!
I am trying to get justice for the 3 of us through a Thai court with a Thai lawyer but my husband refuses point blank to come to Thailand. After nearly 17 years in a marriage, not being able to even contact my daughter and my son not being able to go to school, I think we have rights to something but I just don't know what I can do! How can I get my daughter back? How can I get a school for my son? I don't yet have a job even though I'm trying to find one desperately! I really do think at the very least, my husband should recompense me for the flight costs and legal fees, and also what he'd actually promised to pay me at least until the divorce has been finalised! I was forced to leave Dubai with my son, I can't see my daughter, my son can't see his sister and I don't yet have an income in Thailand so my husband should at least take care of us financially including our son's schooling and allow me access to my daughter. Upsetting the children like this isn't good for them at all and both of them need their mother's love and attention as well as each others! The three of us have never been apart before so I can't imagine how my daughter is coping with it all! My only hope now is that someone reading this will understand my plight and will understand the pain I have being separated from my daughter and with no means of contacting her to at least find out how she is. The man I'd been married to for almost 17 years has just thrown me away for no apparent reason along with the lives of our two children, and I was forced to leave a foreign country with absolutely no choice in the matter, otherwise I would have just been left destitute.
He used/misused/abused German/EU laws against me without my knowledge and even conned me by hiring his own German lawyer to act on my behalf, who in fact was acting against my interests. I was forced to sign papers in German which I didn't understand as I didn't understand much German and they all knew this! A Thai translator was provided but because of probably deliberate mistranslations, I was duped into signing papers which I would not have done if I'd fully understood what they meant.
My husband has lied to people we both knew in an attempt to paint me in a bad light, as it wasn't me who left him but quite the opposite with me being forced out! He hasn't even paid us what he'd promised to pay us when we had to return to Thailand.
I suppose one could consider that he kidnapped my daughter as he kept her behind without my consent and certainly without her consent too! I haven't been able to contact her since so it's obvious that he doesn't care about how the 2 children feel at all. She only stayed with him so that he would allow her brother to leave with me and also because he'd promised that she would be allowed to join us within 4 weeks. This of course never happened! UAE/Sharia law of course gives priority to the man!
He also lied to the German court stating that we separated in December 2013 when in fact we only started to live apart 2 months before the divorce, whilst remaining in the same house. He has thus committed perjury with the support of the layers involved! He had also promised to pay all our removal costs and also for the schooling of our son in Thailand. Of course I have yet to receive anything! I do hope that someone reading this can suggest a way out of this nightmare for all three of us!
Thank You